Friday Laughs – Lawyer Jokes

Sent today on an email – my duty to share and hopefully cheer you up on this crappy damp windy Friday…

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts and are
things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and
published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm
while the exchanges were taking place:

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

 

ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.

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