Bailey’s Custard Tart

It’s been that long since I wrote a post I can’t remember how to do it anymore. As the actress said to the bishop.

The reason I am writing this post is to have a quick rant about Panko Breadcrumbs. Which I will now refer to as Wanko Breadcrumbs (BTW this post is NSFW). I just made some Arancini. But instead of simply whizzing  up some stale bread like you are supposed to , I decided to use up a spare pack of Wanko Breadcrumbs. Basically you end up with something with the texture akin to a packet of crisps. Don’t bother.

Anyway no one cares about little balls of rice covered with crushed up crisps. What people care about is Custard Tart infused with 3 litres of Bailey’s Irish Cream.

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Super Luxury Brioche Bread and Butter Pudding

The ‘Super’ comes from the nutella spread used to sandwich the brioche slices together. The ‘Luxury’ comes from the additional slab of chopped up dark chocolate.

This creation came about due to a series of unfortunate events. Last Saturday England humiliated itself in the Rugby Word Cup, losing to Wales. Now whilst this debacle was going on, we were getting ready to meet with our mortgage advisor the next morning.

Having blown us out once already, said mortgage advisor claimed that meeting on a Sunday morning was no problem and he ‘often did it’. So, documents in hand, the following morning we prepared to set off to sort out our mortgage (oh yes, we are moving). Just as we were walking out the door, I checked my phone.

Text message. ‘Really sorry, I’ve been ill all night, can’t make the meeting’. Blah, blah. Then, rather strangely, the message ended with the mortgage advisor stating he wouldn’t be in the next day either, as if reinforcing the gravity of his life threatening illness.

Gutted. We were really under pressure to get the mortgage sorted. What to do? Well of course, make something utterly decadent. Super Luxury Brioche and Butter Pudding. 

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Chocolate Orange Meltdown Cake

Whilst I wait 1 1/2 hours for my pork ribs to simmer I thought I’d share with you my latest BB. That’s ‘Baking Balls-up’.

It was looking good, and in fact, if I had been in the right mood,  I could have passed this one off as a deliberate creation. I could have called it Chocolate Orange Melt-in-the-Middle Cake. But I cannot lie. Ask the wife. I come out in a cold sweat and start stammering.

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Nothing much wrong with this right? Wrong…

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50 Shades of Chocolate

Grey is so….gray. Chocolate is better. Also you can’t dribble grey over your significant other and, well, whatever.

Also, there could well be 50 shades of chocolate. I’ve no idea. Brown is brown, chocolate is chocolate…but of course it isn’t. Chocolate is a whole world of bittersweet fantasmagorical wonderment. Combine it with cream and strawberries and you have a gourmet-gasm of amaze-balls. Sorry, getting carried away.

Lets get down to business, so to speak. It was pancake day yesterday and so we celebrated with Strawberries and Cream Pancakes with Chocolate Sauce.

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Mississippi Mud Pie

I definitely do like a good pie. Pie and chips. Pie and ale. Pizza pie. Pie-eyed (that’s me). All things pie (except the maths version, which you were taught at school, which is useless information unless you are paid to draw circles, and it doesn’t have an ‘e’ on the end).

But nothing resonates in this food blogger’s brain more than the term ‘Mississippi Mud Pie’. I mean come on, what dish, what culinary creation, has a name more evocative? Dirty water and dirty…well dirt.

Of course, as we all know, Mississippi Mud Pie is so called because its biscuity base reminds one of the banks of the Mississippi. Actually I have no idea what the banks of the Mississipi look like, except from what I have seen watching Mel Gibson in Maverick, and possibly an episode of National Geographic at some point.

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But can a Mississippi Mud Pie really evoke a dirty big river? I can feel a scientific analysis coming on…

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