What Have The Americans Ever Done For Us? Hot Dogs, Buddy, Fully Loaded.

There’s a scene in ‘Monty Python’s Life of Brian’ where a squad of Israelite rebels, led by John Cleese & Co, are discussing ‘what have the Romans done for us?’ The debate centres around whether they should pursue a terrorist course of action, and everyone gets a bit stressed as they start to realise the Roman’s have actually done quite a lot….

‘…All right… all right… but apart from better sanitation and medicine and education and irrigation and public health and roads and a freshwater system and baths and public order… what have the Romans done for us?’

Now fast forward a few thousand years.

Here we are, in the glorious 21st century. For Rome, read Amercia. Now I haven’t spent too much time or effort considering the socio-economic influence of America on the planet. And I’m not going to start now. What I will do is consider the culinary influence of America.

And they have done some seriously important things for us. Fully Loaded Hot Dogs are a case in point.

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Beef Cheek Chilli with Essential Sides

First some things I noticed this week:

  1. Twitter is irritating. For every person that starts following you, 2 stop following you. Actually I think that every time I write a rude word, or controversial statement, like ‘Americans are crap at cricket’ then I lose loads of followers (-1)
  2. The opinion poll industry is a load of crap too (-1), in my opinion. We just had an election and all the polls said it was a neck-and-neck race. But it wasn’t – the Tories (right wing) won it by a mile and Labour (left wing) ended up looking a bit silly (-2)
  3. I am stupid. I have been haranguing my internet provider for the last week telling them their service is shit (-2). After ranting on the phone for hours over several days I finally booked an engineer. Then I checked the back of the modem, tightened the cable and now everything is fine

These are my top three observations of the week and I just realised they all related to communications, media, online; i.e. irrelevant twaddle and no one cares.

What people do care about is food:

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Meatloaf and a Social Media Meltdown

Before I commence I would like to bitch and moan. I have been blogging for something like 3 1/2 years. WordPress is easy and straightforward. You write some blurb. Then you open the file of photos you have to hand and just drag them into the media loader.

When I got a Mac last year it got even easier. It let you drag a photo straight into the text. Couldn’t be easier. Then last month Apple buggered about with the photo app and now I can’t drag anything into anything. I feel like throwing the whole lot in the bin. But I am sucked in. I’m paying WordPress $99 a year for some reason. I’m paying Apple £3 a month for iCloud and I don’t even know what the hell for. I just paid Microsoft £108 to use Word on a Mac which I don’t need but feel compelled to have ‘just in case’.

So I can’t really throw anything in the bin. And if anyone can throw me a bone here, so to speak, explain how to make everything work nice and easy like it used to (in the good old days) then please do let me know…

Anywhoooooo. Meatloaf. Never made one but they look so damned tasty I had to give it a go…

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Rack of Ribs with a Chipotle Glaze

It’s been a while since I did ribs. I went to my trusty farm shop to get some, got home, decided they weren’t big enough, and popped to Tesco and got some much more substantial ones.

Talking of substantial, check out this guy. He is an ‘extreme eater’, and consumes extreme amounts of food. For some reason. He took on the Breaking BadAss Challenge at Longhorns Barbeque Smokehouse in Newcastle and ate a rack of beef ribs, a rack of pork ribs, various other meaty items, some coleslaw and so on. Inexplicably though he couldn’t eat a pot of baked beans and thus, having failed the challenge, had to fork out £35 for the meal.

A failed extreme eater. It’s a lonely job, and no one has to do it. Back to my ribs.IMG_9119

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50 Shades of Chocolate

Grey is so….gray. Chocolate is better. Also you can’t dribble grey over your significant other and, well, whatever.

Also, there could well be 50 shades of chocolate. I’ve no idea. Brown is brown, chocolate is chocolate…but of course it isn’t. Chocolate is a whole world of bittersweet fantasmagorical wonderment. Combine it with cream and strawberries and you have a gourmet-gasm of amaze-balls. Sorry, getting carried away.

Lets get down to business, so to speak. It was pancake day yesterday and so we celebrated with Strawberries and Cream Pancakes with Chocolate Sauce.

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