There’s a scene in ‘Monty Python’s Life of Brian’ where a squad of Israelite rebels, led by John Cleese & Co, are discussing ‘what have the Romans done for us?’ The debate centres around whether they should pursue a terrorist course of action, and everyone gets a bit stressed as they start to realise the Roman’s have actually done quite a lot….
‘…All right… all right… but apart from better sanitation and medicine and education and irrigation and public health and roads and a freshwater system and baths and public order… what have the Romans done for us?’
Now fast forward a few thousand years.
Here we are, in the glorious 21st century. For Rome, read Amercia. Now I haven’t spent too much time or effort considering the socio-economic influence of America on the planet. And I’m not going to start now. What I will do is consider the culinary influence of America.
And they have done some seriously important things for us. Fully Loaded Hot Dogs are a case in point.
Now you might be wondering whether there is anything approximating to a hot dog in that lot. In fact you might be wondering what ‘Monty Python’ is. Maybe even who the Romans are. If you don’t who Americans are or what a Hot Dog is, this post may be a waste of time…
Anyway. To create Fully Loaded Hot Dogs you will…Actually first I need to describe what a Fully Loaded Hot Dog is. It is a large pork sausage served in a long soft white roll, topped with fried onion, BBQ chilli beef with cheese, pickles, green pepper chilli, ketchup and mustard and an avocado salsa side.
You will need everything you see here (actually this picture contains items you won’t need too, e.g. wine and frankfurters. I don’t know what they are doing there):
For the Chilli
- One onion, finely chopped
- 1 pack bacon lardons (whatever comes in your pack, use that. I mean its bacon, and you can’t have too much bacon. You simply can’t)
- 1 1/2 lbs beef mince
- 1 tbsp paprika
- 2 tbsp chilli paste
- 1 tbsp sugar
- 1 tin chopped tomatoes
- 1 bottle BBQ sauce of your choice
For the salsa
- 8 cherry tomatoes, halved
- 1/2 red onion, finely chopped
- juice of one lime
- 1 avocado, chopped
- salt and pepper
For everything else
- Big sausages. Pork based.
- 3 large onions, sliced
- 1/2 tbsp brown sugar
- Big hot dog buns, soft.
- French’s American Mustard
- Tomato ketchup
- Cheese slices
- Green pepper relish
- Dill pickles
First make the BBQ Chilli. Fry the onion in the chilli paste until soft. Add the lardons and fry to render the fat. Add the paprika and stir in.
Add the remaining chilli ingredients and simmer for a half hour to thicken.
Meanwhile, cook the onions. Slice thickly and then gently fry in a little oil in a large pan. Add the sugar and a bit of salt and leave to brown and reduce.
Did I say the wine wasn’t part of this creation? I was wrong. Add a glass of wine to add…well something.
After a half hour, add the sausages to the onions and brown.
Whilst the sausages are cooking prepare the salsa. There are no pictures of this stage because its boring healthy stuff.
You are now basically ready. Put the elements together on a table to enable the gorging process.
Begin at the beginning. Get a bun, stick a sausage in it.
Roll a slice of cheese round the sausage.
Now slather this delight in chilli. As much as your bap can take. And my bap took a lot.
Next the onions. Don’t hold back.
Complete with dill pickles, ketchup and mustard.
Oops I forgot the relish and the salsa…
What have the Americans done for us? This. And it makes up for everything.