Banana-less Banoffee Pie, or Multi-Billionaire’s Shortbread – You Decide.

You see a lot of recipes on WordPress that don’t contain ingredients you would usually expect to see (eg Meatless Roast Chicken or Gluten-free, Lactose-free, Everything-free. I also like the ‘Paleo’ thing – its grains free, right?)

Anyway I was going to make Banoffee Pie. I bought the ingredients – cream, biscuits, chocolate, bananas. Then I forgot about it and the cream went off and bananas went black.

So I went out and bought some more cream and bananas. And forgot about it again. The bananas went black again but the cream was okay. To stop the cycle of banana abuse I decided to employ the kids in preparing something with the remaining ingredients, so we got busy and made something up:

Now I think I’ve done this kind of thing before. However there are some important differences here.

  1. I let the children (God help me) take the lead
  2. We didn’t follow a specific recipe
  3. We used a wicked implement to store the end product.

First we got a big freezer bag and filled it with Digestive Biscuits and then beat the hell out of it with a rolling pin:

Then we mixed the crumbs with some melted butter, added some chocolate chips and then pressed the mix into the base of a big cake tin:

Now the big cheat. We needed some caramel to put on the biscuit base. Last time I messed about creating some with evaporated milk. Fortunately this time we used some already made by those nice people at Nestle; in its goes:

Once the caramel had been spread out it went in the fridge to chill and then we got busy with the chocolate.

First the ganache. We heated some double (heavy) cream, popped in some butter and then poured it over a large amount of very dark chocolate. Then the mix was poured all over the chilled base:

Smooth it out but don’t let it mix into the caramel (which, by the way, is rubbish because it doesn’t set – better to make you’re own).

That’s some seriously smoooth g’nache baby!

Now shove it back in the fridge and get the topping ready. Not too hard. Just break up a load of milk chocolate and melt it:

The trick is making sure all the chocolate gets to that glass bowl

Now pour the chocolate all over the…..well, chocolate:

Put this creation back in the fridge to set for a couple of hours. Now for the final layer: the white chocolate drizzle (which was white chocolate melted with some cream and a dose of vanilla essence):

Now this creation isn’t easy to a) cut and b) move around. To deal with a) you need to heat a knife in boiling water. To deal with b) you need one of these:

Honestly this thing is great – its like a Grab ‘n’ Go device for large, unwieldy cakes. Now I feel some analysis is needed to see what we have actually created here:

I’m sure CSI could use our services should they ever suspect they have a killer dessert on their hands. Meantime I will make do with a nice cup of tea:

Beer maybe your friend but not at 3.00pm. Right?

30 thoughts on “Banana-less Banoffee Pie, or Multi-Billionaire’s Shortbread – You Decide.

  1. Pingback: Classic Banoffee Pie | Happiness Stan Lives Here

  2. Do you mind if I quote a couple of your posts as long as I provide credit and sources back to your website?

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  3. wow that looks so amazing! I don’t think i would be able to get my kids involved in this- there still too young, and none of the chocolate would ever get into the bowls. BTW – i love the ironic coffee/tea mug!

  4. I think I gained 10lbs. just reading that and looking at the pictures! It looked really good though…you might want to try a spring-form pan next time as it would make it easier to get the pie out…or you could just dig into the pan with a giant spoon!

  5. I am amazed at you! You have no respect for your elders. Here am I sweating my guts out in the gym every other day just so I can cook and eat some moderately ‘bad’ food every so often and you do this! Brilliant infographic too. Our neighbour has a cat carrier that looks suspiciously like your cake transporter…..
    Best,
    Conor

  6. How about a stout ice cream float? Your chocolate dessert is sure to please the ladies. I like the diagram; it does look like the soil profiles from a long ago agronomy class. You can freeze the bananas after peeling the black skins. In my mass quantity days we’d freeze very ripe bananas because wasting food was not permitted (at least when someone was looking) and make banana muffins when they came round the menu cycle..

  7. As per usual, you’ve got me drooling with envy lol. Funny you should mention banana abandonment, BabyMibs this week, decided AFTER I’d been shopping that he no longer likes them, sadly, neither do I really, so one happy compost heap for us this week!

  8. Ha ha ha! I love your expression “Banana Abuse”! I do the same, buy bananas for a project, turn out that those bananas wind up in the trash… 🙂

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