Moving

It’s been some time since the Happiness that is Happiness Stan saw fit to write something. For Happiness Stan has been about as happy as a fart in a thunderstorm. Not happy. Not happy at all.

I could go into the intricate details surrounding this lack of happiness….and i will.

Moving. To be specific. Selling one house and then buying another. And then moving from the former to the latter. They say that moving is akin to dying*. And it is. At various times death would have been a…sorry I’ve been distracted whilst the wife is singing along to a live TV version of the Sound of Music…It’s okay she’s gone to get some wine. Anyway back to my point…death would have been a sweet release. The issue?

*(I made that up but it is true)

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Wild Pig, Black Pudding and Breakfasts that ‘set in’

Previously on Happiness Stan…

I went to the butchers and they were slightly annoying.

So a month or so ago we set off shopping, but decided to explore the more rural parts, south of where we live, looking for somewhere different to acquire some bacon and eggs.

We ended up in deepest darkest Surrey (about 5 miles from home).

Here the locals speak in strange dialects, and wild pigs forage for truffles (this may or may not be true, the shop staff we spoke to didn’t have strange dialects, although that might have been because they weren’t local – they could have been bused in from Northern France – and I didn’t spot any pigs, but that doesn’t mean they weren’t there, hiding their truffles).

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Deepest, darkest Surrey…

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Tesco – taking ‘Every Little Helps’ to heart

So Tesco (the UK’s biggest retailer) just announced that it has been overstating its half-year profits by 25% (about £250m). It’s not clear how long this has been going on but the omens aren’t good.

Tesco is to the UK what Walmart is to the USA, minus the firearms. Thousands of stores, millions of customers. It takes nearly 30% of the UK market. It has so much food I get fat shopping there and have to go on diets all the time.

Now, Tesco’s ubiquitous marketing slogan is ‘Every little helps’. And it would appear that the company has been taking this message to heart.

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